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"If you’re really a beginner and feeling shy, you can just start with having one partner hold the other’s hands over their head," Marin says.
"You get that feeling of it, and you can get a sense of whether that’s something you both like without having to buy anything new." Or use the same scarf or tie to restrain their wrists—just keep the knots loose if it's your first time.
So now that that's all out of the way, how do you dip your toe in rougher waters?
Depending on what you like, the first step might be as simple as adding a few simple maneuvers to your erotic menu.
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Either way, this position puts you in charge, so experiment with tweaking or twisting your partner's nipples, or—if you have a male partner—grabbing his balls.
Do It: Straddle your partner at their pelvis, pushing off their chest and sliding up and down their thighs.
These 10 positions for kinky sex are an incredible (read: next-level orgasm guaranteed) way to start: For people who are just starting out, Marin recommends this classic: "Probably the easiest position to try is doggy style because it already feels like a little more animalistic position and lends itself really well to spanking, hair-pulling, and things like pinching the nipples."Do It: Kneeling on all fours, have your partner enter you from behind, either while he's standing and you're stationed on the bed, or he's on his knees behind you.
Same-sex partners could consider a strap-on or just use fingers for penetration.